Even AP's homepage fails at the "lol"

The Associated Press will not haz a cheeseburger after all.

It comes as a surprise to everyone that the wire service was in actual contractual talks for months–yes, “actual months” Fishbowl NY breathlessly assures us–with Pet Holdings Inc. (aka the owners of I Can Haz Cheeseburger.) The reason, according to an interview with Pet Holdings CEO Ben Huh in the Los Angeles Times,

“They felt that allowing the unwashed masses to [alter image captions] would be against their journalistic integrity.”

The main question (“How does an old media monolith like the AP remain hip and relevant in the age of cats with white text?”) is a frivolous statement. The AP has one of the better mobile apps through iTunes, but still suffered earlier this year when Google News revealed it would not host any new content from AP after contract negotiations failed.

Of course, you could always just use Skitch.

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Mid-week announcements are the best when it concerns White House Press Pools.

So without further ado, as Fishbowl DC informs us, Ben Feller is the AP’s new White House Correspondent. Feller covered education for the news organization from 2003 to 2006, switching to the White House since then.

This comes after the AP was awarded Helen Thomas’ seat last week. The official memo is below:

The Memo from Fishbowl after the jump

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White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs wasted no time in pointing out that the press corps was decked out in their “Sunday best” for the debut of the new seating arrangements in the James S. Brady Briefing Room. With the President traveling in Atlanta, GA on Monday there was no daily briefing back in Washington, DC. But on Tuesday it was back to business.

“Church is full today,” joked Gibbs. “That’s good to see.” Here’s the briefing from C-SPAN.

Most eyes were on the Associated Press who now occupy the front row, center seat once warmed by Helen Thomas – but there were several changes made by the White House Correspondents Association and a whole new seating chart – one that may require a booster seat as Gibbs pointed out to America Urban Radio Networks’ April Ryan who could barely see the podium from her spot behind NPR reporter Ari Shaprio.

“Ms. Ryan, you’re going to have to ask that gentleman in front of you to sit down a little,” joked Gibbs. “He’s a little on the tall side.”

Ryan moved up from the fourth row to the middle of the third row next to Politico, which also moved up from fourth to third row. That put Ryan directly behind NPR, one of the contenders for the Thomas perch. NPR was given Fox’s old seat in the second row, directly behind the newly ensconced AP. Fox moved up to the first row in the old AP seat. Got it?

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Ending weeks of speculation, the White House Correspondents Association announced the Associated Press will take the front row, center seat in the James S. Brady Briefing Room at the White House once occupied by Helen Thomas.

The association stated the change will take effect Monday and that it was a “very difficult decision.” Bloomberg, Fox News, and NPR all made public plays for the coveted chair, which did not go unnoticed by the WHCA board. The first few minutes of Monday’s briefing might look like a game of musical chairs since the AP won’t be the only ones with a new vantage point.

The board “was persuaded by Fox’s length of service and commitment to the White House television pool” and moved them to the front row seat previously occupied by AP; NPR will shuffle into the second row seat previously held by Fox, next to Bloomberg News.

Photo: Brendan Smialowski/Getty Images

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Nest of Robins in Bushes Outside Briefing Room Entrance

A momma robin is oblivious to the noisy comings and goings of the press corps as she hatches and nurses her babies in nest near busy doorway. See AP story and pics here.

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